Post by MINNIE EVANGELINE LAWRIE on Jun 5, 2010 21:22:55 GMT
minnie evangeline lawrie , -------
----------------------------------------- EIGHTEEN , HUMAN , NEUTRAL , CARELESS.
" TAKE ME, I'M ALIVE. NEVER WAS A GIRL WITH A WICKED MIND BUT
EVERYTHING LOOKS BETTER WHEN THE SUN GOES DOWN. I HAD EVERY
THING, OPPORTUNITIES FOR ETERNITY BUT NOW I BELONG TO THE
NIGHT. "
[/center][/blockquote][/blockquote]
minnie's journal
PAGE 1
my therapist gave me this journal today. she told me that i need a place to collect and organize my thoughts, that maybe it'll help me figure why i am the way i am. i know i'm right. she's the crazy one. i know what's out there. i know what i saw. and because i couldn't keep my stupid mouth shut, i ended up with a therapist and a month in a psych ward. i'm supposed to go back and see her three times a week so she can ask me questions and pick my brain apart. not happening. i'm eighteen years old and i'm not required for my parents to pick me up and drive me somewhere i don't want to go. i'm going to do whatever the hell i want to do. now that i'm out, i refuse to go back. never in my life am i going to see that therapist again unless they take me against my will; and i wouldn't put it past them to. i'm not crazy. i know i'm not. people are always talking in the shadows about what's going on with whatever's out there. 'vampires' they say. i don't know if i should believe it or not. but i have to, because i know what i saw. i didn't go and report it just to be thrown in the loony bin for nothing. i'm willing to bet that i'm not the only person in this situation - i'm not the only other person who's being sent to therapy for claiming to know about a vampire war. then again, maybe i'm wrong. i was there when the vampires announced their existance, except now the humans shunned them back into hiding. maybe they're all extinct. except they're not. i would know, i'm not crazy.
PAGE 3
today i was told that i need to make friends. maybe i don't want friends. i like being by myself, what's so wrong about that? i have my cigarettes, my alcohol, and my occasional boytoy. so what? i like the way i live and no one is going to change me. it's not like i'm living in a box on the side of the road. i have money, and a lot of it. i have a family who supplies me with money whenever i need it. i like never seeing the same person twice. i'll hang out underground, listen to bands that will never make it, drink a little, and have fun and make mistakes with people that will never see me again. what's so wrong about that? i'm not hurting anyone, i'm not putting anyone in danger. where do my parents get off telling me that i need to make solid, well-rounded friends? i'm not going to look around some ivy league school campus for a friend that i don't give two shits about. it's absolutely ridiculous. i can't even stand it. i'm so close to just leaving. i never want to speak to my parents again. it's not my fault i was attacked, it's not theirs either, but they blame themselves and have grown too over protective. i can't take it anymore.
PAGE 7
robot
you have turned me
into something i'm not
meant to be
you reprogrammed me
and made me into the man
that you want me to be
oh my god, i didn't know
anything that i should know
you were the one to show me how
everything i had to do
start again, all brand new
but i didn't know how
waiting here for your call
waiting for an instructional
booklet to tell me how
nothing that i ever do
was ever good enough for you
you have changed my program
and now, like a robot
taking me over
i don't know nothing
what can i do?
i'm a changed man
you had me programmed
it's part of your plan
what can i do?
like a robot
taking me over
i don't know nothing
you changed me, reprogrammed me
like a robot
taking me over
i don't know nothing
what can i do?
oh my god, i didn't know
anything that i should know
you were the one to show me how
do this, do that
you would shout
if i didn't do it now
then you would turn my lights out
waiting on your beck and call
waiting for an instructional
booklet to tell me how
but i seem to have gone
i am now your robot
not allowed out on my own
(lyrics by miley cyrus)
PAGE 16
i moved out today. i got my own apartment, gained access to my trust fund, and i am now my own person. i haven't spoken to my parents in a few weeks and i never plan to again. if i had siblings, i probably wouldn't be speaking to them, either. i guess i haven't spoken much lately at all, really. i haven't seen my therapist since page five of this journal, yet i keep writing in it. i don't know why. i guess it does kind of help, when you think about it. i get all my thoughts out on paper and it helps me figure out how i feel about everything that's happened to me. i still have the scars on my arm from my attacker, the biting and the clawing. most of the time, i'll wear long sleeves just to keep people from assuming i'm suicidal. it's funny, you'd think that i would be suicidal after everything that's happened, but i'm not even near it. i figure eventually everything will get better in time. i'm still jumpy, i'm still easily spooked, but i'm healing. i'm still not making friends and i still don't want friends. i don't want to let people in. i don't want to have to care about anyone else other than me. i need to put all of my protective energy into looking out for myself, especially after. things are just hard now. i was hoping they'd be easier, now that i'm out of my parent's house and by myself. but nope. it's not that i'm struggling to make ends meet. i'm just scared of who might be at the door next time i hear a knock.
medical report, 3/14/2010
patient: minnie e. lawrie
age: eighteen
gender: female
admitted upon: severe external injuries to the head including blood trauma and lacerations with possible need of stitches, lacerations to the left arm (appearing to be bite wounds), and two broken ribs on the left side of the ribcage. patient is admitted unconcious.
admitted by: gloria sanchez, no relation to patient
units occupied: emergency room, intensive care, operation prepatory, operation room, recovery, rehabilition.
discharge date: 3/31/2010
police report, 3/17/2010
victim: minnie evangeline lawrie
age: eighteen
gender: female
description of attack: attacked by a young male, between the ages of eighteen and twenty two. the attack occured outside the east side of hyde park around nine pm on march eleventh. victim claims to have been bitten.
found by: gloria sanchez, no relation to victim.
description of attacker: male between the ages of eighteen and twenty two, brown hair, approximately six feet tall, thin. no distinguishing features could be seen.
other information: the victim was left unconcious in the park for two days before anyone found her. gloria sanchez, a local elderly woman found the body and recognized a pulse but claims to have immediately called an ambulance. further questioning is underway.
HI, MY NAME IS SADIE. I'M SIXTEEN YEARS OLD AND I'VE BEEN ROLEPLAYING FOR FOUR YEARS. YOU CAN REACH ME THROUGH PM OR MSN AND I ALSO PLAY NO ONE YET. I'D JUST LIKE TO SAY C:
MADE BY LILLY CAN'T BE TAMED OF CAUTION 2.0.
